I have been sick off an on for the past few days, stomach stuff. And before this was of course the bike accident, and before that was the toe situation...This summer has been one thing after another. I didn't go to either job today, and my check is going to be small and I can just see my roommate's face in my head going, "I told you so" and all those people who keep asking me if I think I can afford to live in an apartment getting together and throwing a big "I told you so" party on my behalf.
My mother, God bless her, has told me not to worry too much about paying off stanford right now and instead to get myself together. Because she truly had to experience me at my most removed from reality, I think she cares about me in a deeper way now. She doesn't want me to stress out, to overwork myself, and I can understand her concerns. So, it will take me a few months before I am back on some sort of track, things haven't fallen apart quite yet (but the book Things Fall Apart is a must read!)
I have had some machinations these past few days and will express them once I have ironed out all the intricacies in my mind. What I want, how I want to live, who I want to live with, all kinds of things. I am sure that three years from now I will look back on this delicate time in my life and smile because at that point I will be able to see it for what it is, the beginning of a turning point. But of course, in the thick of it, all I know is the swift movement of which there seems to be no end.
No comments:
Post a Comment